Personal Story from a Reader

​I would like to share with permission the following from a reluctant wife turn loving strict keyholder.  She contacted me and wanted to share her story and to say that she was happy to see some information posted that is written on this blog….if only she had it as a resource.  She wanted to add in her story to show how her and her husband play.

My husband of many years approached me about chastity a few years ago and honestly I was shocked and was wondering why the hell he would want this and why did he not want to have sex with me.  Those were my initial thoughts.  One thing he told me that really got me to consider being his keyholder was when he told me that I will reap the benefits of it, he will be more involved in me and family life and that we will both be benefactors of me being mean to him and allowing me to use him as an outlet of frustration.  He told me this in his own words and I was very skeptical, especially the last one. Eventually I agreed. I had no idea what I was doing, but I played along. He gave me ideas and told me what I could do along the way.  I teased him by caressing his body, biting his ear, playing with is device and some heavy kissing sessions.  I would sometimes take him out of his device and play with him.  I would stroke him, play with his balls.  I would even go down on him and lick him, but not let him orgasm.  I felt bad, but he said he enjoyed it and it was what he wanted.  He would pleasure me orally and gave me good orgasms, but I wanted sex. We did and he had a fairly intense orgasm, but for about the next ten days he was in his own little world. I was mad, I told him if he doesn’t shape up I’m not playing his stupid game. He explained the difference between a male and female orgasm and it kind of made sense.  The next round we went longer. He pleasured me with his mouth and fingers and he was getting better and I was having good orgasms, but I wanted sex. We had sex, he had an intense orgasm and then he went MIA for about eight days. I realized then that I never orgasmed or “enjoyed” the sex. Yes it helped me feel closer and more intimate with my husband but I didn’t get to enjoy it.  

Before this foray into chastity, my husband and I had a “normal” sex life filled with up and downs. I didn’t orgasm very often from sex, not sure why but it isn’t like my husband is small or didn’t know what he was doing. He was good, but I never got sexual pleasure from sex I just enjoyed the intimacy, plus my husband was always willing to take care of me or I would take care of myself at another time. I know it may sound bad, but it wasn’t at all. I enjoyed our sex life but wish it was more active but with kids and busy with work we would squeak it in when we could. 
Back to my original thought, so I was thinking that not giving him an orgasm by teasing and denying him was what he liked and when we had sex he orgasmed and I didn’t then he was basically MIA for a while. How could I change this pattern?  I actually came up with my idea when I was masturbating with a dildo.  If I use a vibrating fake penis to pleasure myself, then I can give one to my husband. I stopped mid-masturbation and looked up on the internet to see what I could find. Find did I and that is a whole other story. I found three items that I thought might work. It was a little pricy, but I did it in the name of science and my benefit. I ordered a strap-on, a penis sleeve and a “clone-a-willy” kit.  I used the “clone-a-willy” kit to make a fake penis of his and would use it from my pleasure would tease him how he had sex with me.

After a few more weeks, I told my husband that I wanted sex, but it was going to be a little different. I really wanted to try the penis sleeve.  I laid him down and tied his hands above his head and blindfolded him. I took off his device and slipped on the sleeve. It was a little difficult because I didn’t want to hurt him, but it was successful.  I took off his blindfold and showed him what he was donning.  I straddled him and slipped his now encased penis into me and started to ride him.  He told me couldn’t feel a thing so I untied him from the bed post and flipped over on my back missionary and made him have sex with me. I teased him a little bit and asked him to be a little rough enticing him to try and make himself orgasm, but no matter what he did, he couldn’t get off and I was enjoying every minute of it both sexually and sadistically.  We probably had sex for about an hour and it was the most enjoyable sexual time of my life.  We tried many positions and different aggressiveness from slow and gentle to hard and fast and everything in between.  After I finally got an orgasm from it, we were both physically spent.  I had a fantastic orgasm and I’ve never seen my husband so frustrated, yet so content in my life.  When we finally decided to get up, I took off the sleeve and stuffed him back in his chastity device.  What was even better, the next ten days he was so attentive and we had sex that way a few times and he pleasured me orally several times.  I don’t remember having that many orgasms in one week ever.  We tried a strap-on too and it was just as enjoyable.  One difference was that I kept him in chastity we the strap-on and I could feel his device hit me everytime he thrust.  At first it was annoying, but after a while it was almost funny cause he was trapped inside unable to get hard and here he was having sex with me, so ironic.  We have sex often this way because, while I enjoy orgasms from him performing oral on me, I feel the orgasms are better when we are having sex.

After that experiment, things started to change.  I felt more confident and started to be more domineering in and out of the bedroom, just not overtly outside the bedroom.  I decided to see how far I could push him without letting him have an orgasm, but at the same time I set myself goals of one week at a time because I did feel bad that he was so frustrated, but he kept telling me he was enjoying it and was happy.  I ended up not allowing him to orgasm for about four months.  He was so frustrated and horny he couldn’t touch me without being driven wild with desire and frustration.  I started to tease him more and tried to make him as frustrated as I could.  As I pushed him, he pushed back a little bit and I told him that he needed to be punished.  Other than a spanking I couldn’t think of anything else so I did that. He “enjoyed” it, but it wasn’t his favorite.  I then remembered something I read; it had said that strap-ons had recently increased in sales amongst couples and surveys had shown that heterosexual couples were engaging in strap-on sex where the woman would “peg” her spouse.  Pegging involved the wife donning the strap-on and having sex with her husband in his ass.  I didn’t think my husband would go for it so I did a little test on him to see how he reacted.  I decided to take him out of his device and tease him really good.  I kissed him all over and would lick and suck on him, marking him with little hickey’s.  I got down to his penis and would litely suck on him and play with his balls.  I put him in my mouth and played with is balls and started to explore the area between his balls and his butt and he didn’t object.  I went a little further keeping him on edge and started to rub around his butt hole and still no objection.  I got up and got some lube and applied to to his penis and did slow long strokes and applied a generous amount of lube and rubbed it around his balls and then started exploring again and he got a little squirmy, but I think he was so sexually frustrated from all the teasing.  I went to his butt hole and applied some pressure and my finger slow started to sink in and when I fully penetrated him with my finger he let out a moan.  I didn’t do much just moved my finger a little bit and continued to tease him and after a few minutes I stopped and made him get back in his device.  I decided to make my move next time we were intimate together.  It didn’t take long.  I told him I had a surprise for him and I tied his hands to the bed post and went into the bathroom to put on the strap-on.  I came out wearing it.  He laughed and said that I looked ironically sexy wearing it.  I walked over to him and leaned in close and whispered in his ear that I will be wearing it tonight.  I thought his eyeballs were going to pop out of his head.  I then told him that he had been a bad boy and wasn’t listening to me and this was his punishment.  I crawled on the bed and got in between his legs, he had a look of apprehension on his face with maybe a little anticipation.  I applied lots of lube and crawled over him and slowly started to penetrate him missionary style. His face was priceless as he started to adjust to the invading phallus. I pushed until I was completely inside of him and asked to see if he was okay. He said yes and told me that it was a different feeling, but was somewhat pleasurable. When you peg your man, it can apply pressure to his prostate which is a contributor to semen and ejaculation.  I slowly built up speed and it was a different experience doing the penetrating. It was intoxicating and I had a feeling that I would want to do it more often whether he wanted it or not. That’s the benefit of being his keyholder and his submission to me.  Sometimes I would really make it feel like punishment by making him get on his hands and knees and handcuff his hands and have my way with him, like I’m the man and he is the woman.  It is such a powerful feeling.  I’ve even made him suck on the strap-on, he knows he was really bad when that happens.  I’ve made him orgasm while pegging him while he was locked in chastity.  He said it was a different experience; he had a feeling of release but he felt no after effects that he normally felt when he would from sex or normal stimulation.  He sometimes felt more horny and frustrated, especially when I would continue to try to stimulate him as mush as I could. I’ve also had an orgasm from pegging him.  I would get pressure on my vagina and strap-on would rub me or stimulate me the right way.  I would suggest to be careful and talk about it.  He takes my strap-on every once in a while and he gets some enjoyment out of it, partly because I enjoy it and sometimes it stimulates his prostate and can some release from it. 
One thing that I implemented was one time per year, he could take off his device and have as much sex or intimacy he wanted and I couldn’t deny him what he wanted unless there was a really good reason.  I called it, “I’m your slut week.” I know this my sound degrading, but I wanted him to feel that I’m his to enjoy.  I could pick however long I wanted to allow it any where from three to ten days.  He would not know how long, I would just let him know that starting a certain or staring today is his week of freedom and sex.  The first time all he wanted to do was have intercourse like two times per day.  It was fun but tiring, but I gave him the entire seven days.  The next time, I purposely did it when I was on my period and to my chagrin, we had sex twice in five days.  He volunteered to lock himself back up.  He later told me that it wasn’t necessarily the blood or the ugliness of it, but my emotions and my “moodiness” were not allowing me to let him have fun with me.  I agreed, but I also punished him for not taking advantage of me, for ending it early on his terms and not mine and for calling me moody.  I punished him for just for fun for calling me moody.  The following time, he was super, he didn’t just have sex with me.  I think I still got more orgasms then he did that week.  The last time I gave him his week was a week in which I knew he was traveling.  He was out of town for four of the seven days, but I made it interesting for him.  I would send him teasing pictures or texts/sexts and one stipulation I made was that for every time he masturbated, it would add a week of strict chastity.  He was locked up without any stimulation for nine weeks.  I was relentless about the teasing and drove him nuts, but at the same time he had no self-control.  I punished him for that severely as well.  I do “I’m your slut week” every once in a while which comes out to be about once a year, maybe a little bit less.  I don’t want to do it at the same time every year so he doesn’t know when to expect it.

So, I give my husband ruined orgasms for the most part now instead of full orgasms.  About the only time he gets a full orgasm is during “I’m your slut week.”  A ruined orgasm is when you are stimulating him and stop stimulation of this penis at the point of no return before his spills over into an orgasm.  If you stop stimulation right away he gets very little to no enjoyment from his orgasm, hence it is ruined.  Sometimes I do it with sucking him, stroking him and even with sex. If he goes too far and doesn’t let me know, he gets punished and often time I put him in strict chastity for an extended period of time. Ruined orgasms are a way to give him some relief, but without the side affects of him being distance and MIA for a week.  It is also quite fun for me because he becomes almost desparate to orgasm and to just ruin it makes him so much more frustrated and on edge.

Our story took quite a while to learn and to understand.  It took a few years for everything to take place.  I didn’t all happen at once.  We were and still are learning and experimenting.  Today, my husband is still locked in his chastity device and I have no idea when his last full/enjoyable orgasm was.  He knows though, but I know it has been a while.  One thing that I have learned through this is you have to just be yourself and both husband and wives, you are doing this for each other.  Two have to play and participate in the game.  There are times when we don’t have sex or play for a week or two at a time and then there are times when we have fun every night or every other night.  You still have to live your life and your job, family, chores, etc. have to get done.  I initially thougt this would be a short term thing and as of right now I don’t plan on stopping.  My husband and I are as close as ever and my friend’s comment on how I have such a good husband, if they only knew.  For my husband and I, this arrangement is good for us.  I’m happy because while he is in chastity, I can play with him if I want, I can ignore him (not for too long) and he is fine and not begging or in the bathroom masturbating.  It is a fun game and I get what I want that makes me happy.  He spends time with me, cuddles me and is a very good helper of chores around the house, including things he usually doesn’t do.  As for him, I don’t want to speak for him but I’m giving him what he wants and he is genuinely happy.  How do I know?  He tells me and he does the things that make me happy.  If he isn’t happy then he wouldn’t do those things.  He was absolutely right when he said that he would be more involved in family life which he is and that I reap the benefits of the chastity relationship.  In addition, he loves it when I’m mean to him, when I push his limits and at times I punish him because I am having a bad day and he loves it.  I get to take some frustrations out on him in a way that allows me to blow off some steam and in a way that is enjoyable to him.  He told me once that his happiness comes from my happiness, my smile, my laugh, my love and my punishments of him that help me turn from being mad/upset/annoyed/pissed to being in a better mood, whether those negative feelings are at him, my kids or anyone or situation in general.

Thanks for allowing me to share my story MCI —– Anonymous Keyholder
This has been edited and modified with permission and approval from the author.

-MCI, keep ’em locked and have fun!

Getting Started In A Chastity Relationship

Getting started into male chastity can be an overwhelming task, especially for the wife when this is brought up by her husband.  Where is the right place to start and how do we start?

  1. Device: First of all either both of you or he needs to research the chastity device of choice.  They can range from cheap knock offs to expensive custom-made devices.  There are essentially two types of devices a belt and a ball trap design. Belts are designed to go around the body for security. Ball trap designs have a base ring that wraps around the balls to secure the tube.
  2. Initial Lock Up Time: Wives, this is for you.  The initial lock up time for your husband needs to be a minimum of three months.  Woh, that’s a long time*. Yes it is, however things you’ll need to consider for this to be effective for both you and him.  First off, wives you will be his keyholder and you need to be able to say no, disregard his advances and questioning for unlocking him to satisfy him.  He receives no sexual satisfaction during this time.  It allows you to adjust to the new concept and gives you the confidence and the power to take control of his orgasms and his pleasure….just as he wants you to.  For him, he needs to get adjusted to being locked up, being in sexual frustration and allowing you time to adjust to being in control. This is a commitment for him and he needs to take it seriously. If he is not ready to commit to at least three months then he’s not ready to commit to you and this lifestyle he wants.  Ultimately, wives it is your decision on the length of initial lock up time. This can be a fluid number and a timeframe in which you can change for  longer if you’re not satisfied with his behavior or if you still feel uncomfortable with managing and denying him. Extend till you do, just tell husband that you are doing it for your comfort levels.   *Ladies, if you cannot go without intercourse sex for that long, you have a couple of options. Have intercourse, but DO NOT allow him to orgasm. Buy a strap-on or a penis sheath for him to wear. He will experience sex without experiencing sexual satisfaction. Finally, get numbing cream, apply it to him and put on multiple condoms. The cream will wear off, make sure he doesn’t orgasm.
  3. Punishments: Wives you now wield the power of control of your husband’s sexual energy. Take some time to find out things he likes and maybe things he’s unsure about, but willing to try. Punishments can be thought of as things that either frustrate him more, demeaning/a little humiliating or he might like to have physical punishment. Why not take the time to find out what he likes? Be open and embrace them, he may be hesistant, but allow him to share with you. Some of them he either wants to try or has thought about because he thinks you may like it or it is a way that gives you “power” or a dominant role over him. Be open about it and willing to try it, it may not be your flavor, but in the end he wants to focus his energy on you and these things might be his way to enforce it.  “Don’t knock it till you try it.”
  4. How to use punishment?  Wives, more than likely he wants you to punish him. He wants you to take control and take advantage of the sexual control you have over him, punishments give you a more physical and/or psychological dynamic of control. Use it lovingly, randomly and frequently.  Punish him for even the smallest offense.  Be loving with some of your punishments and be stern with others. Punish him for no particular reason or make up a reason.  Ask him what he did wrong or what he did that displeased you. Ask him randomly, but not frequently, especially when you know something that he did that displeased you or when you don’t and I’m sure he’ll find something that he thinks displeased you and you may find out more about him.
  5. Tease: Wives….tease your man.  Wear sexy clothes, send sexy texts, take pictures, tell him about how much you love to tease him.  Teasing does so much more to boost his libido and to boost his attention to you.  You are giving him attention and showing him how sexy you are.  He will embrace that and encourage you.  He will love every minutes of you and your sexiness.  Tease him and then tease him some more.  As they say, “Be Careful What You Wish For”.  This gives you an opportunity to drive him crazy and as a result he will want to please you and worship you.  This also gives you the opportunity to maybe find out what else he likes, his kinks and fetishes and it makes him want to please you.
  6. Denial: Chastity is about denial.  Chastity give you control over his sexual energy and the ultimate release of that energy.  The device that you choose as your weapon to control his sexual energy is just that.  It doesn’t allow him to be selfish with his release and his own pleasure.  You pleasure should come first and frequent.  Deny him the opportunity for release over and over again with teasing in between.  Make him beg you, make him squirm, make him ache. This focuses his mind and sexual energy on you because the only way he will have an opportunity of that sexual release is through you.  He has just given you the gift of giving you attention and devotion by giving you control of his most favorite and desireable activity, sexual release. Harness it and turn it into your favor by denying it.  Use is as a weapon to get things you want, whether it be sexual in nature or work, chores, weight loss/exercise, honey-do list…what ever you desire.
  7. Release: Wives, remember, this is something that he wants, but doesn’t at the same time.  He wants you to control his orgasms and allow you to decided when and how he gets to orgasm.  Now it is up to you to decide, you can make it enjoyable for him or you can make it frustrating.  The thing is, do whatever you find most fun.  He wants this, he craves this.  His mind is focused on the possibility of orgasm day in and day out when you hold the key, but at the same time, he wants you to say no.  He wants you to deny him, to make him wait to be so sexually frustrated that he can’t think straight.  Learn to love to say no for him and then tell him to satisfy you.  Be sparing with his enjoyable releases, but at the same time, make them memorable.  Tease him relentlessly whether over the course of a few days or weeks or in one night.  If you want to keep him on edge, make up an excuse for his behavior and edge him and deny him or ruin his orgasm.

    Wives, as stated before, this is what he wants. He wants to be denied and focus his sexual energy on you and your pleasure, not only sexually but emotionally and through acts of love and service. Have fun with this, tease and deny him, punish him, make him please you, make him squirm and beg and thrn deny him over and over again. You might even enjoy this new found power dynamic in your relationship and his need and want to please you without getting any himself.

    -MCI, keep ’em locked and have fun!

    Wives: Is chastity right for you?

    Take some time to consider the following questions:

    1. Are you unhappy with how much attention he is giving you?
    2. Do you want him to participate in family functions and be more present in your and/or your families life?
    3. Do you think or has he admitted to you that he masturbates too much?
    4. Do you want him to help with household chores and honey-do list completed?
    5. Would you be willing to give up intercourse with him, at least in the short term, if you got a lot more attention from him from both physically and emotionally?
    6. Are you wiling to take control and put in the effort to make you relationship work in a new and exciting way?
    7. Do you have a little pent up aggression you would like to take out against your husband in a productive way?  Even a way that he may want?
    8. Do you want to be the center of his sex?  Be the focus of his sexual energy and desires?

    If yes, then you definitely should consider chastity for your relationship.  Has your husband decreased the amount of attention he gives you both emotionally and physically. Don’t let your marriage slip away and be co-existers under one roof.  Take control of your husband by controlling his penis and orgasms.  Chastity is the tool in which provides you with that control.  You will have the key to his chastity device and therefore you can control him and his pleasure.  If your husband has asked you about this then sieze it and control him, mold him and use him for your personal, household and sexual needs.

    – MCI, keep ’em locked and have fun!

    Wives; Be CRUEL to your Husband!!

    Bottom Line: He asked for this didn’t he. Why not take advantage of this? Gives you a chance to take some of your frustration you have with him out on him in a way that he may “want.” He has given you that freedom and outlet.  Have fun with it, he asked for it, so why not be mean or cruel to him.  Push his limits.  There is a common saying with tease and denial and male chastity: BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR.  Make him understand that. He has given you the gift of controlling his orgasms. Be sparing with his orgasms. Find ways to be intimate and sexual with him while denying him.

    Husbands into chastity more than likely want to be teased and denied their orgasm.  If you hold the key to your husband’s chastity device, think of it this way, his penis is now YOUR toy.  You now control it and only you can play with whenever you like and however you like.  This empowers you to do what you want with it and make him “suffer” (something he probably wants).  Why be CRUEL?  Well, deep down, even if your husband doesn’t want to admit it, he wants you to. He wants you to say no, he craves you to tease him and then deny him. He wants you to push his limits, to see what you can dish out and what he can handle.

    Your new favorite word will be “NO”. Husbands may beg and plead for orgasm, but they really want you to deny him that release. It may be confusing in the moment of passion as they will do anything to go over the edge to orgasm because it does feel good, but ultimately they want that sexual frustration. Wives, you have options, say “NO,” ignore their pleas or strike a deal with them on something you want to try (see list of ideas below) or something you want them to do (honey-do list), threaten them with longer lock up time or time between tease sessions or anything else you can come up with. Then you get to decide his fate by denying him, ruining him or giving in to him. It’s you’re choice anyway and that is what your husband wants, he wants to give you his right to have an orgasm. Remember, his penis is your toy now since you hold the key.

    • Ruined Orgasm
    • Extended Chastity/Denial
    • Give him tough options: “If you want a full orgasm, you’re next chastity period will be at least double. If you want a ruined orgasm, it will add two more weeks. No orgasm, you must give me ten before you get another chance.” Have fun with it. You could add things you want to try like pegging, making him wear your underwear, or anything you can think of. Make it a “lose-lose” situation for him and make him make a choice.
    • Flirt with him heavily. Send him either text messages or pics throughout the day, wear next to nothing at night to bed, masturbate in front of him while not allowing him to touch you.
    • Peg him. Anal sex can be very pleasureable for men or women as long as you do prepare and do what is necessary.  Men can have prostate orgasms which is accessible through the anus.  Prostate orgasms can be somewhat fulfilling to not fulfilling at all.  If he asks about sex, reply yes, then pull out the strap-on and tell him you’re ready. He wasn’t specific on who’s doing the giving or receiving.  
    • Play games with him that are close to impossible for him to win. Roll dice: if he rolls a snake eyes, he gets to orgasm how he chooses. If he rolls a three, you get to choose. Every other number is the number of days he has to wait to try again at a new roll.
    • Do an orgasm ratio. For every 100 orgasms he gives you, he gets one.
    • Only perform up strokes when playing with him. Most of his pleasure that he gets is when he inserts his penis, pushes into you or the down stroke. You can also rub the underside of the glans or head of his penis. It is very sensitive. At times he can get off from just that, but most of the time he needs a little bit more stimulation.
    • Have your husband lay on his back and you insert him inside of you and stay still. Then either you yourself masturbate, make him play with your clitoris or use a vibrator in yourself. He will feel all sorts of feeling and sensations as your vagina reacts to the stimulation. Bring yourself to orgasm and then when you are done, get off of him. Then it’s up to you to decide what to do next. Ruined orgasm, back in his chastity device, edging session, or tie him to the bed and leave him there until he can calm down. How cruel to you want to be?
    • Use chastity as a weight loss incentive for him. For every x amount of pounds he loses he gets to do y.  If he gains weight, then it increases his length of chastity by z timed number of pounds gained.
    • Buy a strap-on or a penis sheath and make him wear it and have sex.  You can keep him in chasitty with a strap-on but not the penis sheath.  He can go all night if you wanted to and try as many positions as you can.  He will be so frustrated because he is doing the act of sex, but he is not recieving any stimulation.  To make sure that he recieves no stimulation in the penis sheath, you can add a numbing cream and condoms.  Make him have sex with you till you have multiple orgasms. 

    These are just some ideas for you to run with.  Remember, this is something he asked for.  Remind him: Be Careful What You Wish For!!!!

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!


    Sexual Intimacy and Chastity

    Wives, you’re gonna want to have your sexual intimacy with your husbands, but you have them locked down.  How can you navigate this?  Your husband has probably been pretty attentive, loving, helping and overall been in a better mood and now you want that intimacy that goes along with that closeness you are feeling.  However, your husband wants to be denied and you want to keep your husband on this level of lovingness.  There are some ways to be intimate, yet deny your husband any release. How so?

    There are several ways to keep your husband denied, but have that intimacy you desire.

    Ruin his orgasm, the more ruined orgasms you can give him prior to sexual intercourse, the longer he may be able to last longer during intercourse.

    Penis sleeve, extender or hollow dildo:  A penis sleeve or extender slips over his free penis.  It can add girth and length to his penis.  One thing to be sure of is to find out whether the sleeve or extender has any built-in stimulation for him on the inside.  Make him have sex with you while wearing it.  He will more than likely have very little to any sensation to his penis, while you enjoy the intimacy of intercourse with your husband, albeit maybe a little longer and wider than you expected.  He will be able to last longer and have about as much intercourse as you can handle.       **Hint: to make sure that he doesn’t get much stimulation, add a desensitizing cream to the inside of the sleeve or extender to make sure he doesn’t get any stimulation.

    Strap-On: Buy a strap-on for him to use on you.  You don’t even have to unlock him, fit it over top of his cage and have fun.  Find a favorite dildo or fake penis and mount it to the strap-on and make him have intercourse with you.  He gets absolutely no stimulation while performing a very intimate act with you.  An added bonus will be that he will be able to have intercourse with you until you are done.

    Multiple Condoms: Put several condoms onto yours husband’s penis.  If you a feel that he may still try to get a release or release too early, you can fill his condom up with desensitizing cream and then have intercourse with him.  This can be very limiting to how long the desensitizing cream lasts and how intact the condoms will be after intercourse due to friction.  Friction will break down the condoms.

    Choose your weapons wisely.  Just remember he wants to be denied, he craves to be denied.  Give him what he wants while getting what you want, that sexual and emotional intimacy.  You will more than likely be able to have a prolonged intercourse and intimate experience you both will enjoy, however you might leave him in a quivering mess of sexual frustrated energy.

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!

    Ruined Orgasm: What is it? Why? Oh, How much fun!

    Maybe you’ve heard of it, if you haven’t here is a little detail on what is it, why and how much fun it can be for the wife.

    What is a ruined or abandoned orgasm?

    A ruined orgasm is teasing your husband while bringing him to the brink of orgasm. One you reach the point of no return where he is about to spill over to the other side of orgasm, stop any stimulation to his penis. If done correctly, he will dribble semen out of his penis with very little to no force. Very unlike a partial or full orgasm. With a partial orgasm, he will have one or two medium forceful contractions before any dribbling occurs. This can be a tricky process, because there is a fine line of giving too much stimulation and giving him either a partial or full orgasm or not allowing him to go over the edge at all.  Your husband can find some pleasure with a partial orgasm, which usually occurs when you’ve caused just enough stimulation to him for him to have a forceful contraction or two.  The forceful contractions that you usually see with a full orgasm are what is pleasurable for him.  Preventing those contractions are key in denying him that pleasure turning it into a very frustrating experience.


    A ruined orgasm is exactly what it means.  It is totally unsatisfying for your husband.  Why is this important?  It has to do with the neurotransmitters in your brain and what happens with a ruined orgasm versus a full orgasm.

    With tease and denial as part of your relationship, you are building up your husband’s sexual energy and flooding his brain with dopamine and oxytocin.  These are the neurotransmitters that are the feel good neurotransmitters in your body.  They flood your brain after a very satisfying dessert, meal, behaviors such as shopping, gambling, working out or even use of recreational drugs.  Another neurotransmitter, prolactin, spoils the party after your husband has an orgasm.  This neurotransmitter  can hang around for up to 10-12 days subduing your husband from intimacy.

    With a ruined orgasm, it prevents prolactin from being released and keeps your husband’s sexual energy high.  However, this can be a frustrating experience for your husband as well.  Once you’ve ruined your husband’s orgasm, he will be ready to go almost immediately afterwards.  He will continue to stay hard and will be begging for action to for a possible full release.

    Oh, How much fun!!!

    This is where you, the wife, can have lots of fun.  With your man locked in chastity, you can tease him all you want and lock him back up. Build up his sexual energy and those neurotransmitters flooding is brain.  He asked for this anyway, didn’t he?  You can mess with his mind by bringing him to the brink and ruining his orgasm in order to continually keep him on edge. A ruined orgasm is not satisfying and is quite frustrating. Your husband may beg and plead with you to finish him off or what is even more fun is watching and listening to him go through a ruined orgasm. He may moan and groan, hump the air, his penis will twitch, he will try to seek out any stimulation to help push him over the edge of a full orgasm or possibly even a partial orgasm. Want more fun?  Tie him up and do it repeatedly until you know deep down he can’t handle it anymore or until he no longer dribbles  anymore semen (a dry orgasm) which means his balls have run dry. Enjoy giving him the agony of being so close, yet so far.

    Afterwards lock him back up and he will be just as or even more horny than before, possibly more.  At this point he will probably be more willing to attend to you both physically and/or how you need him to be.  Try things you want to try since you have been doing this “for him.”  He may become more submissive to you in which you can take control of more aspects of his life, such as dressing, time, how he addresses you, etc. Ruining him, you may see an improvement in behavior and willingness to do things that he is told. He will be extremely sexually frustrated, while he may plead with you, this is the high that he wants and craves.  If he continues to plead or beg you, threaten him with more locked up time or “x” amount of ruined orgasms before he is allowed to achieve a full one.  Use it liberally and make empty promises of full orgasms filled by ruined orgasms!  After all, he has asked you to take control of his orgasms and now that they are yours, you are free to do what you want with them and he is at your mercy.

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!

    How long should wives lock up their husband’s penis or deny their orgasm?

    As long as you want!
    There are so things to keep in mind when it comes to locking your husband in chastity and denying him orgasm.

    • After your husband has an orgasm, it can take 7 and up to 10-12 days for the hormones involved to balance themselves out again. Don’t let him fool you, he’ll be horny and ready to go the next day. Experiment with him and see how long it takes for him to start to be more loving, affectionate, and helpful.
    • Communication with your husband is important. Find out what he thinks and his desires. He might completely give you free reign to decide or try for x amount of orgasms per year or x length of time without. Find out why.
    • Play a simple game with him. Dice. Make rolling two sixes his opportunity to have an orgasm of your choice.  Any other number rolled will give you the number of days, weeks or months until he gets another chance to roll the dice.
    • Play with his mind. Give him a date. He’s going to be anxiously waiting for that day, then completely forget about it. If he doesn’t do things that you want or doesn’t listen or be attentive to you, add days or weeks or months depending on how mad you are.
    • Make it seem like today is going to be the day. Then completely avoid the topic, edge him over and over again, give him a ruined orgasm, or use toys on him, peg him, make him satisfy you over and over again.
    • Your husband’s prostate health is important. There isn’t research that proves frequent ejaculation is good or bad. Reports have been released that states anywhere between once a week to every once in a while, but there is no correlation yet.
    • If you are wife in which your husband asked you to do this….always remember that “He” asked you to do this to him.  Remind him “Be Careful What You Wish For!!”

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!

    Pegging: What is it and Why?

    Often pegging is associated with chastity play.  There are various reasons as to include pegging into your play and it varies from couple to couple.
    First off, what is pegging?  Pegging is when the woman wears a strap-on with her male partner for anal play/sex.

    So pegging involves you, the wife, wearing a strap-on and then having anal sex with your husband.  Many people’s first question is; does this make him gay.  No, while some guys have a phobia of being labelled that, being gay or homosexual means a guy wants to have a physical and emotional attraction to other men.  Enjoying pegging and anal play, just means you enjoy pegging and anal play.  Pegging does not emasculate him, unless you and your husband are into into emasculating.  Your husband may be a little apprehensive about pegging, even if he brings up the topic.  Make him feel comfortable through communication and let him know that you are enjoying it and it is sexually stimulating for you.  Pegging and chastity play is linked because the husband in chastity doesn’t receive any pleasure, besides the pleasure that he gives you.  Wives, this is your chance to give your husband some pleasure, but no need to worry, you will also receive some stimulation from the strap-on, more or less depending on the one you choose.  Once you have started pegging your husband, make it part of your sexual routine.  It takes some time for him to adjust to the act of being pegged.  Think about it, when you lost your virginity, it took some time to adjust to that as well.  Your husband will need frequency and time to adjust and will enjoy it more and more.  There may come a time where your husband will want/need it because of the new erogenous sensations.  At the same time, it would be ideal for you to make sure that he still pleasures you to reinforce that his pleasure is still secondary to yours.

    Now, back to some reasons to include pegging.
    Pleasure:  Many men find it a highly pleasureable experience.  Men have what is often referred to as a p-spot when penetrated similar to the female version of the g-spot.  The p-spot refers to the massaging and stimulation of the prostate gland through the rectum.  When husbands are penetrated by their spouses by a strap-on, it can apply pressure on the gland which can produce highly pleasureable feelings and some men report having an orgasm-like sensation without penile stimulation and it’ll stimulate the gland causing excretions.  The excretions increases with your man in chastity because the prostate is a contributor to seminal fluid.

    Release: Similar to the pleasure aspect, it can give your husband some release of pressure or discomfort with the feeling of release of fluids after a period of chastity.  With your husband in chastity, the prostate gland still produces some fluid that contributes to the make up of semen.  With massage of the gland through anal play the prostate can release some of the fluid.  Sometimes this can be pleasureable to a point, but for the most part it is not pleasureable.

    Role Reversal: Wives and husbands can experience a role reversal in terms of the giver and the receiver.  It can be a turn on for both because it takes on a new role for each person.  Both wives and husbands can experience penetration from a different viewpoint and partly understand the concept of each others roles.

    Dominance: Some wives use pegging as a tool for establishing dominance in their relationship.  The wife who has the role of having the “penis” or the “top” in the relationship is psychologically considered the dominate role.  The wife can establish and maintain this dominance by using her strap-on when she chooses, perhaps “forcing” her husband to have sex with her.

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!

    Benefits for your wife/keyholder

    Attention: Now that your husband does not have access to his penis, his thought process changes from quickly trying to find a way to obtain pleasure to redirecting his sexual energies to his wife.  Now that the wife controls the key to his ultimate pleasure, he cannot go off and get off himself.  He must now direct that sexual energy to his wife because she holds the key and he can longer do it himself.  The wife will received more attention in numerous ways including help around the house, massages, cuddle time and willing to do things that he normally doesn’t do if asked.

    Sexuality: If possible, your husband is more than likely willing to have sex with you everyday if he could.  With you in control, this dynamic changes.  You are now in control of sex.  A husband with a free penis will constantly pressure and explain that he needs to have sex.  A husband in chastity now has to wait for your willingness to be ready for sex.  This difference is due to the fact that a free husband will constantly pressure you day in and day out for sex.  While a locked husband, has to make the mental choice of pressuring you for sex or not.  If he does pressure you, you can decided how long he has until he is able to be freed.  In a normal type of relationship, the wife may just oblige just to get him off her back, even if she isn’t really willing to do so.  As a result, it can affect your relationship because now she feels like all he wants is sex.  With her in control, she decides when and where to have sex.  If she’s not in the mood, then his penis stays confined.

    Secure:  This idea can come from a myraid of possibilities.  An obvious one is the fact that when their man is locked, there is no chance for infidelity.  Another idea is that you are certain that now that you have locked your man, he is no longer able to masturbate.  If you feel offended when he masturbates, this will help you know that he is now not allowed to do that and therefore you will now be the only one who can provide for his sexual experience based on your terms and needs.

    Devotion:  Men tend to try to only seduce their wives when they want sex.  After that, there is no continuous state of love or desire.  When you lock you man up, men tend to become more romantic and give their wives more attention and devotion.  Your husband now turns his sexuality to you and devote his efforts to love you, give you attention and romance you as he has no easy outlet for his sexuality.  Devotion from your man to you involves willingly giving up his manhood to you in order to make you happy.

    Improved Sex Life:  While this may see ironic that locking up your man’s penis may help with your sex life, but it usually does.  Often the idea of sex is centered around the man’s orgasm.  However, if you change the focus of your orgasm as the primary goal of sex, you can remove his orgasm as a result.  If you think about the role of the male orgasm.  Your husband wants to orgasm to ejaculate his semen inside of you.  The only time that is necessary is to have a baby.  A women’s orgasm isn’t dependent on making a baby.  Logically thinking, this means that the woman’s orgasm is strictly for pleasure and the man’s orgasm is strictly for having a baby.  In addition, many women struggle with having an orgasm through normal intercourse.  Why not take control of your husband’s orgasm, unless you are planning on having a baby, in addition to making sure that he gives you all the orgasms you want however you want to get them.

    Control:  In most relationships, the woman tends to have control over their man, whether they know it or not.  If you embrace this control and take the power given to you through chastity, you can start to dictate many other things in your marriage.  It gives you an opportunity to explore your sexuality with your partner through many avenues and where ever you want to take it because now you are in control of the sexuality between you and your spouse.

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!

    How does this change our sexual intimacy?

    Locking your husband’s penis in a chastity cage does change the sexual dynamic in your relationship.  He tells you that he wants you to lock him up and you do, so what’s next?  It varies from person to person.  As the wife and the keyholder, it is really now your decision as to what happens next.  If you like it when your husbands performs oral sex on you, then have him do it whenever you are in the mood.  If you want to have intercourse with your husband, do that.  Your husband may not want to orgasm or may ask you if he can orgasm and that is for you to decide.  If you want to get into the heat of the moment and enjoy each other physically then do that and let fate have its way.  If you orgasm before him, you can stop and keep him frustrated or keep going and give him the thrill of orgasm.  Wives may not be the dominant type and men have to understand this, but giving your wife the comfort of owning your package between your legs instead of pushing them to dominate you will go a long way.

    What is probably going through your husbands head is the fact that he wants to cherish you and be physical with you in any way he can.  For some husbands, their spouses are dominating their thoughts and want to be physically intimate to show them how much they love their wife.  Many women are not that way and want to have an emotional connection before they want to be physical.  For chastity guys, they want to be locked up in order to direct their attentions from always wanting to be sexual to where their wives want them.  It gives these men in chastity to try and connect emotionally with their wife, which is what wives want before being intimate.  That may sound bad, but locking up their penis diverts their attention from being sexual to trying to be a better husband.  It may not make sense to you wives, but it can change their attitude towards you in so many ways.  A man thinks with two heads, if you lock one of them up, it can change things.

    If husbands can understand that chastity may put a strain or a awkwardness on their relationship, don’t push it.  Keep it simple and allow their wives to get used to the fact that they now make the decisions of sex in your marriage.  Let them decide and don’t push them to the point of not only wanting to stop chastity but also it will not help in getting what men want, a physical relationship.

    Wives, understand that your man wants to be with you emotionally and physically.  By being their keyholder, you can control them in any way you see fit.  Use it to help them understand how to connect with you emotionally to give you want you need.  They crave your touch and your intimacy.  Allow them into your emotional life because they are willing to give up their “manhood” for you and to be a better husband.

    —MCI, keep’em locked and have fun!!